Who's your favorite?

It is interesting to see how kids develop in their thought processes. The latest thing for Niki is to ask me who's my favorite. I always tell him he is my favorite boy. Sometimes he presses me further, and I know what he is looking for. Sometimes I ask him who's HIS favorite (mother, father, sister, Oma etc.)--he loves it! I am glad to announce I am his favorite mother and Günter his favorite father and a relief that Jenna is his favorite sister. He also admitted she is his favorite friend too. I know he won't always feel that way, but nice that he does now. I will take what I can get!

I just finished reading the book "Are You Somebody?" by Nuala O'Faolain--a memoir of her life growing up Irish Catholic. It is a very good book about family dynamics, trying to find love and feelings of loneliness and loss. It did put me in a bit of a reflective mood. She wrote this in "middle age"--I guess that is somewhere in the 50's. Since I am in my 40's, it brings up some of the questions you begin to struggle with during this phase.

I am a bit out of step with my peers, since most friends my age are launching children into college or missions, but I am still in the potty-training stage with mine. I know that I am a much better mother because I have more perspective and understanding at this age. I have worked through many of my Family-Of-Orgin issues and don't think I am passing too much of the dysfunction down that I was raised with. Even still, I find that I have trouble with patience and energy at my age. In some ways I think I would be a better grandmother than mother at this age! Nevertheless I am ever grateful that I AM a mother--for many years I thought that would not be a reality for my life.

As I have posted in the past, it is a lot harder than I imagined. I find myself struggling with the mundane-ness of it all and how I seem to have lost myself in this role (but I am slowly recovering it bit by bit as they get older).

My parents are getting older and they both have poor health. Who knows how much longer they will live. At the end of Nuala's book, she faces that death is pushing behind us all. Because I am caught up in daily tasks I often don't take the time to reflect on life unless I am shocked by someone's death or tragedy.

At times like that it really does make me reflect on Who's my favorite and do I really show that...I can do better with showing my children and husband and Savior and Heavenly Father they are my favorite. We all want to be cherished!

Hospitalization narrowly avoided

Yesterday was a horrible day for me. All week I was nervous about Niklas's health and decided to take him to the Pediatrcian on Friday morning. When we walked in, and were waiting to check in he began his coughing and the doctor standing there said "I know HIS diagnosis!" Then we were asked to stay in the infection room rather than the regular waitingroom (at least it had nicer toys there).

Once the Chief doctor came in he was quite serious and said Niki has this. Great. Lets add that to the bronchitis and pnemonia, ear infections and tonsillitis. The poor kid, not only does he have a barking cough but big black circles under his eyes from not being able to sleep or breath too well. The doctor was truly worried and made up all the paperwork and sent us to the hospital in Kaiserslautern. He gave Niki a steriod suppository (Prednisone).

I didn't plan on it going that direction (We usually walk out of his office with antibiotics, and that is what I thought would happen again.) I had some errand to do--including meeting people on the military base that bought some stuff from my on-line yard sale. So we went to get things done first.

BTW, I don't think I will do the yard sale thing again unless it is a big item. People say they will buy things but don't show up(and I listed it as sold and lose other buyers), or show up 2 hours past the apointed time, or they don't have space in their car for the large items (go figure) or the right amount of money. Plus some people that came to my house walked around and would see the piano and say they wanted to buy it...Um, everything I own is NOT for sale... I think in the future I will stick to giving away stuff. Only one of the 4 people showed up for the meeting.

Afterwards I thought that I better go pick up Jenna since I doubted that we would be done at the hospital (which I thought they were just going to do another Xray and blood work) by the time her bus would take her home. So I picked her up and stopped at Burger King for lunch for the kids and we took it to eat at the hospital (I rightly assumed there would be a lot of waiting time).

The first real aggrivation was finding it. It is in an obscure place in the city center. Once I did locate it I had trouble finding parking. I tried to park along the street but you must buy a ticket at the little stands along the road and you must have correct change (and I only had a bill). So I finally decided to go to the parking garage. Then I got the kids out and discovered Jenna had made poop and had to change her diaper. Then Niki had to go potty and I worried we would make it in time so he wouldn't pee his pants. I pulled them along and tried to find the Kinder Klinik on the small campus as fast as I could! After averting the pee crisis, I took the paperwork to the front desk and they instructed me I must go register (insurance) at another building. I was surprised since I didn't expect this and they said that likely he will be on IV antibiotics over the weekend and have surgery early next week and have to stay another 7 days beyond that. I was sick with anxiety at that point. I went back out to the car and had trouble finding my parking ticket. You have to have that to place in a machine and pay for it before you drive out. I finally did find it.

I called Günter and he was in a meeting in Frankfurt and wouldn't pick up the phone. I tried 3 times then got very mad. I looked for phone numbers to call some friends locally, but had nothing in the car. I was very aggitated!

I drove out of the parking garage and went to park along the street only to find out that I needed not only 1 euro coins but also a 50 piece--the machine doesn't make change! I ran to a shop (left the kids in the car) to get change. When I was coming back I saw someone leave a space open right by the hospital so I turned the car around to park there. Once I arrived, it was taken. Since it was one-way streets I had to go around the area to get back to the street I originally went on and all the spots were taken by then. I had to park several blocks away at the bottom of the hill.

While we registered Jenna was eating her cheeseburger and Niki was playing with the glass doors to the room, and I was trying to understand the receptionist (who only spoke German) while watching the kids and giving information about Niki and the insurance. It was nerve wracking to me! Then I took the kids back to the Kinder Klinik and we were seen by doctor but Niki's cough was much better (I assume from the steroid).

I then had to take the kids to the ENT clinic and we waited over 1 hour (with no toys in the waiting room) to be seen. Did I say I was on my last nerve? When we were seen the doctor asked if I wanted him to have a tonsilotomy or tonsilectomy and if we wanted it there or with Dr. Baker (his normal ENT). I really didn't know. I mean no one was telling how bad it was and if it was emergent. I knew his airways were problematic, but that was all. Then they asked if I had given him ibruprophen. Yes, for his fever. Then she said they can't give surgery for 4 weeks since the last time it was taken. You have got to be kidding! I was upset. She went and got the chief doctor and he explained that there is a high risk of complications with bleeding and they won't do it. I lost it about then. I said, well if he dies because he can't breath, isn't that a greater risk! He checked his tonsils and said even though they are extremely enlarged, there is enough space for air to go through and he won't suffocate. How comforting. If he is so sick the Pediatrician sent us there, and they can't do anything to treat, why were we there? The kids kept touching the tools and going around the room and I had trouble concentrating, and weighing my options while the doctors talked. Several times they asked the kids to be quiet--yeah, right--like they listen to anyone.

That is the time I made up my mind we are not staying. I went back to the Child doctor and explained it all and said that I didn't think he needed to stay in the hospital if he could have the antibiotics orally at home. I talked him into it and he gave me a very high level to give as well as the steroid (Prednisone) and a special medicine for coughing.

As I was taking the two tired, one sick child to the car, all I could think of was Jenna's hospitalization and how stressful it was trying to keep her still in a bed (with an IV line in) when she is so active and there was nothing to do. I was so grateful we avoided this, for now. I felt liberated!

I still don't know what to do besides the medicines. I will call our regular ENT on Monday and tell him the situation. I wish I had someone to help me decide if we should have a partial or full tonsilectomy and tubes in his ears. What is the best? I don't want to continue having all these problems with his health and don't know if it will help or further hinder things.

After the kids went to bed I just wanted to vegetate, which I did by watching a movie. I hope I can get my equalibrium back. Niki will have to be home the next week while he is on the medications, so I won't have any freedom in the days to come. Being a mom is so much harder than I thought it would be.

Dejunkin

I really believe in being thrifty. I love a good garage sale (especially when I lived in Spokane) and love thrift stores (the best I saw were in Colorado Springs), ebay or any other ways to save. I like to get and give a good deal. It feels great to let go of things that I will not use. I would even say it is theraputic. It is just like leaving behind emotional baggage (in therapy) and having new, clean space to think.

My mother is a horder and so is Günter's. Günter himself has the tendancy keep things (even empty boxes of things he buys...) so I am up against some tendencies that are hard to fight. Because I lived in a home that was somewhat junky, I try really hard to get rid of things as I go. It is hard because of my thriftiness.

I sometimes think I may need or want it in the future, so I should hang onto it. But you know where that leads. Anyhow, I have been doing great at dejunking the kids rooms and clothes (remember THAT post and pictures?). I give away most of the clothes to church friends.

My good friend (that is moving to Australia--boo hoo) had to get rid of things in her house and told me about two places here to get rid of things. There is a yahoo group called freecycle ramstein where you can post things you want to give away and people email back and take it. Also I discovered RamsteinYardSale (which is in rival with ebay in some ways and they can set up one in any location) . You post a picture and list a price and people email you, then you arrange when and where to get it to them. If you link to that site you can see all the stuff I listed. It really got me going.

It is a pain to take the pictures, resize and then post it, but nice to see things that have been sitting around house make some money. All the good stuff went fast and now the other things probably won't go so I will then advertise them with my church and with the freecycle to see if anyone wants them before I give it to the thrift store.

It is interesting the emotional reaction I have to all this. I was excited, then pushed myself to dig even more. I drug things down from the attic this evening and will post them tomorrow.

The kids had mixed feelings. Niki was very upset and said that he won't have any toys. We have kept Jenna from the room with all the stuff because I know what her reaction will be!

While I was up in the attic the kids came up and found new toys to have. It was like Christmas all over again. All my play therapy toys came out. I knew all the toys so well from my hour and hours of play with other people's kids and now I have kids of my own! I thrill came over me as I thought back to those years where I had this ache in my heart because I wanted kids and didn't have them.

Now my doll houses are being played with Jenna and Kaye's wooden doll house is now used as a garage for Niki's cars.

How blessed I am to have these kids and to realize my dream. I often forget this in the bustle of everyday life.

My house, heart and soul is getting dejunked!

Flying Binkis and bumpy orthotics

Since Jenna was born she had some trouble soothing herself. We quickly introduced the binki (aka schnüller) and she took to it. I thought it would be good to help her learn to keep her mouth closed (and maybe help stop drooling). I was never was sure when the right time was to move on from the binki, so I let her continue. Months and years now have gone by and it was always in the back of my mind that she needed to stop using it but I dreaded the weaning process. A few months ago she went to the dentist for the first time and I was surprised that he knew she still was using a binki, and that jolted me into thinking finally I should do it. Afterall, she needed it when in the hospital and at various times when she has had to go through a lot of new things, but she was through those now. It was time. One night I couldn't sleep since I was obsessing about this process. Well, this weekend (Friday) I did it.

I know this probably wasn't the right way to go about it, but I told her that her binki's flew away to a baby that needed it. I didn't want to tell her I was taking it away or she would whine and try to manipulate me to giving it back to her. It was the best I could come up with.

I was absolutely shocked how well she did. She never once asked for it over the weekend. She has cried in the night and I have put her in bed with me to help comfort her, but each night she has gotten better. I guess she was totally ready. She has been watching this show where they read a book about a girl getting rid of her schüller over and over. Niki freaked out and thought we were going to take his cuddle duck away too. I guess that is for another time. Now I wonder when I will tackle potty training!

Last fall when we met with the Developmental Pediatrcian at the ReHa, they recommended special orthotics for Jenna to help her get more feedback from her feet, which could help with her balance and sensory issues. It went back and forth all year. The OT said that the insurance would only pay for regular ones...so we told her we would pay the difference (189 euros--highway robbery) just so the process would go forward. Then she said they wanted the doctor to call the insurance...we waited and waited. The school year ended and I was chapped about it not being accomplished in that time! When Jenna went back a few weeks ago I started pushing the issue hard. Waa-Laa, we have them now. I was shocked when I first saw them since I was thinking of something like the bumps in those massage sandals or something. Well this is what they look like:

We have to gradually introduce them since they are very drastic. Looks like they would be quite uncomfortable!

She hasn't been complaining when we make her wear them, so that is a good sign. We will wait to see if a bill comes. I hope when the doctor called that took care of the billing too.

Jenna is a funny girl. The favorite things she loves...Hats...she sometimes puts them on her feet and scoots around the room laughing.

Playing in the sand:

Making tea parties/picnics. She lays out all the dishes and things on a blanket and sometimes has a teddy bear.

She is Miss Congentiality--always smiling and friendly to people. Even ones she doesn't know aren't real!

She is growing up.

Ha Ha Ha--I caught you lurkers!

I feel giggly for tricking you all! How so?

The last few weeks I have a bit of a hard time feeling like no one really cares. Yes, I know my kids and husband and some close friends, but ...the rest of you...the ones that never leave comments, but still want to know about my life...you.

I was telling my friend about how sad I was because I thought I had been a good friend to people but wondered why they didn't keep in touch. They keep in touch with other friends, why not me? What is wrong with me? (Yes, I know I am terribly insecure at 44, and it is embarrassing).

I need you--it really makes my day when people show me I am worth their time (my love language). It only takes a minute and you don't have to write more than one sentence. It is better than an email in some ways because I don't feel like I have to write back a lengthy response about things that I have already posted.

I know I am rambling...anyhow, I found on my friend Angi's blog a counter to see how many people were actually coming and added it to mine (and that helped to sooth me because the numbers were going up fast.)

Angi then told me about a widget that records where everyone visiting is from. I added it and now I know!!! Ha Ha Ha. I caught you lurkers!

Please leave me a comment once in a while. I will make my day!

Another meme

1) Are you currently in a serious relationship? Yes--since 6 April 2001. I waited a long time for it and even had to twist his arm a little to consider me seriously (I am older than him).
2) What was your dream growing up? It depended on the age, but overall it was to be a mother (and that included a wife by default). But I did dream of being an archeologist, and a teacher.
3) What talent do you wish you had? I always wished I could play the piano. I took lessons as a child but never stuck with it. I took lessons as an adult too but didn't continue because I found it hard to practice with all the commitments in my life.
4) If I were to buy you a drink, what would it be? A diet coke--fountain drink.
5) Favorite vegetable? zuchinni
6) What was the last book you read? "My Sister's Keeper"--about what happen to the family dynamics when a child has leukemia. Excellent book.
7) Which zodiac sign are you? tarus--bull-headed, no surprise!
8) Any tattoos and/or piercings? Explain where. Only one piercing in my ears and I got those when I was 21.
9) What would you say is your worst habit? My critical nature--I have to fight that and work at being positive.
10) If you saw a friend walking down the street would you offer them a ride? Depends on where I was going, and if I was late. I would definitely wave.
11) What is your favorite sport? Used to be running (as a participant) but now I enjoy watching swimming (especially after the Olympics) and gymnastics.
12) Do you have a mostly negative or optimistic attitude? I always called it "realistic" but I am mostly a skeptic that is faking an optimistic attitude until I get it!
13) What would you do if you were stuck in an elevator with someone?I would probably start by complaining about it breaking--ha ha. Then if it was a long time I would ask about them and tell them a little about me.
14) What's the worst thing that's ever happened to you? Well, there are several things but the very worst was having my colleagues murdered in our office by a crazy ex-patient.
15) Tell me one weird fact about you. I can use my feet like hands, when I concentrate. (Am I the missing link?)
16) Do you have any pets? Not now, but I had cat (that died months before Jenna came). I am thinking about what pet we might get when the kids are older.
17) What would you do if a friend showed up at your house unexpectedly? I would talk on the porch (so see if they just stopped for a brief reason) then I would invite them in (and be embarrassed because my house was not picked up).
18) What was your first impression of your best friend? My best friend was 12 at the time and I thought she was so beautiful and popular she would never be my friend.
19) Do you think clowns are cute or scary? Cute, but there are some scary ones out there!
20) If you could change one thing about how you look, what would it be? My nose--I wish I had gotten the surgery to remove the boney parts at the very end a few years ago when they fixed my deviated septum.
21) Would you be a crime partner or someone's conscience? Depends on what it was that was planned. If it was just fun mischief I would go with it but if it could hurt someone or break the law I would desaude the person.
22) What color are your eyes? Hazel.
23) Have you ever been arrested? No.
24) Bottle or can pop? Do they make Bottle pop still?
25) If you won $10,000 today, what would you do with it? Go to the states and visit everyone with my kids in tow.
27) What's your favorite place to hang at? What?! With my kids? McDonald/BK with a play area--pathetic!
28) Do you believe in ghosts? No, but spirits.
29) What's your favorite thing to do in your spare time? Read books.
30) Do you swear a lot? I can probably count on one hand how many times I have sworn in my life.
31) What's your biggest pet peeve? Smoking and people that don't work hard.
32) In one word, how would you describe yourself? complicated
33) Do you believe/appreciate romance? Oh yes, but I married an engineer and he has a different idea of that than I do.
35) Do you believe in God? Oh course! I can't wrap my head around the idea that people DON'T believe in God.

No surgery

The Pediatrcian called with the lab results and Niki is too ill for surgery. We have to finish the antibiotics then have another X-ray then we can have ths urgery in 2 weeks.

Recently I was flipping channels (looking for Olympic coverage) and there was this black and white Italian 1947 movie of Pinocchio. Jenna was enthralled by it. She won't sit and watch any animated Disney movies, but she wanted to watch this 4 times! Too funny. Since it was dubbed over in German and it has been decades since I had read the story, I reviewed the plot here. I don't remember all that happening in the story!

An entire day at doctor's offices

This was a day that I wish could have been different.

Jenna had the day off since it was Maria Himmelfahrt (Mary's Ascension to heaven)--funny that Germany has all these religious holidays and only the old people go to church!

Anyhow, I was not looking forward to the day, but add Jenna to it, and I was nearly dreading it.

First, I had an 8:30 am apointment at the Pediatrician to take blood and see if he was healthy enough for surgery on Wedneday (has to be less than one week prior to surgery). He took the blood and Niklas only cried a little but was soothed with gummi bears the doctors gives by the handfulls. While I was there I asked if they had recieved the final report (including the genetic work-up) on Jenna's stay at Homburg Hospital. They hadn't--so I will have to follow up there. The doctor thought Niki's cough and ungs sounded bad and referred us to Radiology for an X-Ray to see if he was healthy enough for surgery. I also showed him Niki's feet (he has a growth above the heel) and referred us to an orthopedist.

We had a 9:15 apointment with the ENT to go over the risks of surgery as well as checking his ears and tonsils. He said the tonsils were not infected but just very swollen. I told him the Pediatrician wasn't sure if a partial tonsilectomy was a good idea until they got the blood work bad which would indicate which was better--partial or full. He saw fluid in his ears still, so the tubes are still needed. (Oh, now I just remembered I wanted to ask him about where to get the special plugs to seal his ears when he swims of takes a bath. I will have to remember to ask that next week).

Next we went to the anesthesiologist. Unfortuantely the normal one (who is from India and speaks decent English) was not there and his colleague (who spoke poor English--worse than my German) went over the risks of Anestesia--I am glad I know it from when Niki got his Adenoids out because otherwise I would know nothing. In case you are thinking that I am arrogant to think that these doctors should know my language while I am living in their country, I just want to say that they are certified for the military members that they are able to converse in English so the base with refer to them (most military members and families are only here for 2-3 years and will not be able to learn the language beyond small talk--certainly not medical terminology).

After we left there we went to the Orthopedist and they said they could see us in 45 minutes but I had the sense to ask for an apointment the next week.

Then we drove to radiology. Niki had to have the X-ray 4 times because he wouldn't stand still (with his top off, smashed against a board with his chin in a holder and a protective "skirt"). He was scared of the noise and I don't blame him, it scared me and sounded like a sudden tornado coming through the room.

We then waited to talk to the Radiologist who said he has bronchitis (didn't like the look of his ribs) moving to pnemonia. Great. So I called the Pedatrician back and they wanted me to come right over to get a perscription for an antibiotic and waited for me since thier office closes early on Fridays.

We had a late lunch and I took the kids to the playground for an hour.

On the way home I stopped at the Pharmacy only to find out they didn't have the antibiotic in stock and I will have to return tomrrow to get that.

I got home around 3:30. I had a near anxiety attack after the radiologist, wondering if we should just delay the surgery but then I would have to wait another couple of months to get on the surgery rotation again. Niki has ear infections about the same amount as he doesn't and it makes me so nervous to hear him sleeping since he sounds like Darth Vader and I worry his enlarged tonsils will cut off his airways (see, my fear of him dying has just gone from SIDS to this).

Anyway, we will see if this really takes place after the doctor gets his labs back on Monday.

Olympics

I was glad that I could watch part of the opening ceremonies from the games. Why only part? Because we were having a bad storm and the sattelite signal was interrupted. What I did see was amazing--the technology, vision and money (apparently equivalent $60 million) to produce it, not to mention the full year most of them practiced 8 hours a day, to get the timing (particularly the men under the boxes simulating typesetting). I doubt any opening ceremony can outdo this one. It was also interesting to be exposed to more of thier culture. If not for communism, I would love to travel there and learn more.

Since Niki always has something funny to say, when I am watching the games he gets excited when he sees this:

Since he thinks it is the same as this:

And anyone who knows him, knows he is obsessed with cars and knows most logos!

It is hard to follow the US teams since we have BBC and they mainly show their countrymen and races, and we have the German stations showing theirs. Boo Hoo. I remember 4 years ago quite distinctly joking with other women friends about my infatuation with Michael Phelps. Since then I have had a child, and I take him swimming I have a secret dream of Niki being an Olympic swimmer!

So far he has 5 gold medals and 3 more to come (I assume and hope). So far every race he has set a new world record! To think that his mother put him in swim lessons at 7 to give him a driection for his ADHD energy. His parents are divorced and he has no contact with his father. His mother is a school teacher, so he comes from a humble background. Goes to show that if people have talent and find a way to get the right training they can do amazing things!

I do love to watch the gymnastics and have tuned into the sand volleyball.

I can vaguely remember my competitive spirit when I ran on BYU's track team and that anyone--even the last one in the race--must be immensely proud to made it there! GO USA!

Wedding

It took me a few days to recover from the wedding. My age is starting to show me up (I need bifocals now too) because I cannot stay up late and bounce back easily.

Dagmar became my friend in the year 2000, I met her when I attended the German congregation in Kaiserslautern. She has a Ph.D and law degree from the prestigous Heidelberg University (all by the time she was 26). She speaks 5 languages fluently (German--of course, English, French, Italian and Dutch). As you will see she is petite and beautiful and humble and funny too. She focused on international law and worked in the Hague for the Tribunal, in Strassbourg at the European Court of Justice and the Hague again for a high judge that included her working with the Federal Chancelor of Germany. Then she (after much agony over leaving her profession) decided to serve a mission and went to SLC temple square and Kentucky and she served in the only place where she could be an AP (assisant to the president) in the SLC temple square mission. After she returned she began working for our church in Frankfurt as legal council for international affairs. Wow, it is a bit intimidating. I was very curious what type of person she would marry!

The wedding was a full day event for us. Günter and I got the kids off to their KiGa's and then finished packing up things and left. We drove to the Franfurt Temple (for non-LDS it is a special place not a regular building we have Sunday services). It was wonderful to see her married not just for this life but for eternity.

Afterwards they had a church service for all of her family and friends that are not LDS. It was lovely.

Afterwards the typical German tradition is to have some hord'vours and juice (normally non-LDS have champagne) and everyone greets and mingles.

The professional photographer took a lot of pictures (which I tried to stay out of the way of, but felt competitive since I wanted some nice pictures too) and Günter and I headed to the Golf Clubhouse. We had about 1.5 hours before the reception officially started but even still we felt nervous to get it together in time. I had already put together all Dagmar's & Björn's growing-up and adult pictures together with music (and titles and transitions etc). I took pictures of the wedding and got some from Björn's father from the day before where they went to the Standesadmt (townhall) to be married legally. They had a dinner afterwards. So I had to go through all the pictures (and a few videos I took) to add to the show.

In the meantime Günter was trying to hook up all the systems. He put up the video beamer but found the program on our laptop was not compatable and we didn't have the time to figure it out or download new programs etc. We were both quite stressed about that time. Luckily we found out the band had a DVD player and it worked with the video beamer so I had to finish the show so we could process it (1 hour 15 minutes) then burn it to a DVD to use.

People were coming in when I was on the computer and I had to tell them that I couldn't talk because I needed to concentrate. The band was working to get the sound system up so it was loud and I couldn't really hear the music on the show to match the photos or videos, and the time was short so I just did the best I could.

We had the computer processing while we had dinner. Speaking of which, they did this quite classy. The tables had white linen and all arrangements of cutlerly for every course. The first was riccolia leaves with flowers (some are edible!) with avacado and red mellon. The next course was sorbet to "cleanse your palet" (the dish was chilled and rim dipped in sugar).

After the fathers spoke, Dagmar and Björn spoke. Then we had the main course--buffet style. It was all Caribbean--red snapper, and side dishes (fresh corn/black beans/red peppers soaked in coconut milk), other main and side dishes that were delectable.

Once it was dark and everyone had finished eating we showed our montage. They both seemed to like it and were surprised to see videos in it. I was glad it worked out to even be shown!

Everyone mingled then there were gourmet desserts (including my favorite Creme Brulee) and just before we were to leave (at midnight) they brought out the wedding cake (called a 'piece montee' (traditional French wedding cake)with small round eclairs stacked into a pyramid with carmelized sugar dripped over it) with sparklers on the top.

Towards the end of the night the thunder finally produced it down-pour (after a muggy day) and it came down in torrents. We packed up our things and ran for the car.

We got home around 2 am. I was so grateful that my friend Angi watched our kids--she picked them up from KiGa and the ReHa bus and had them for dinner and came back to our house to get them to sleep. I can't even tell you what an angel she is--another benefit to going to our church--I make wonderful friends!

Back full circle, Friday Günter returned to work, I got the kids off to preschool and fell asleep (for what I thought would be an hour). At 12:05 I woke up disoriented and realized that I was to pick up Niki at 12. I threw on clothes and jumped in the car and got there about 12:10 so he was waiting and not panicked yet, nor had the teachers called me. However, that didn't prevent me from having a major shame attack. Even though I was still very tired I didn't dare allow myself to sit on the couch in fear I would fall asleep and not hear Jenna's bus at 2:30.

I was glad to be able to attend the wedding and to see my friend married (at 37--the same age I married Günter). I did feel mixed feelings though because I will miss the relationship as it was and know that she will be processing most things with her husband now--as it should be. I guess parents have mixed feelings too because with happy events usually means changes. Even though we wish for the changes they still make us all adjust and things are never the same. I wish the best life for them and hope they are able to have children (which I know my friend really would like but it doesn't always work out so easily, as I am an example). To a happy life together--Dagmar and Björn!